


Watching From a Distance

by ayasato



Category: Naruto
Genre: Angst, Drama, F/M, One-Sided Attraction, Romance, this fic is so very old
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-17
Updated: 2017-11-17
Packaged: 2019-02-03 17:00:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,077
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12752463
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ayasato/pseuds/ayasato
Summary: She felt that she had the obligation to do it. Post-war. Happy Birthday Naruto!





	Watching From a Distance

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this way back in 2011, which explains the... stellar quality, haha. Posting it here for archival purposes. It was supposed to have 3 chapters too, but ending it here seems fine.

Mixed emotions filled her sad emerald eyes as she stared at the blue-green crystal dangling from the necklace in her hand. The crystal glowed slightly, as if somehow alive, reflecting her pale face despite the darkness of night. On each side of the crystal, were two silver orbs; two small bells, fixed in such a way that they would not jingle merrily anymore, or clatter against the crystal - yet they seemed quite normal on the outside. She shifted her hand slightly, her eyes watching it swing gently back and forth.

The thick string was black, so black that she could barely distinguish it from the shadows of her bedroom. It was soft, though. She made sure that it would not irritate the skin in any way when worn... no, if worn during a battle, with sweat and bruises coating one's neck...

She gave a quick glance to the clock on her bedside table.  _One thirty-five_. Is it late enough?

Sitting on her bed, staring and staring at that damned necklace was what she had been doing for the whole evening until now; memory after memory, _regret after regret_  haunting her mind for hours. She'd made too many mistakes; enough so that she was too scared to just go and...

Shutting her eyes, she sighed a bit more deeply than intended and flopped backwards onto the bed. After feeling the satisfying  _crack_  of her backbone, she rolled over onto her stomach and continue to stare at the necklace. More like stare at the crystal; it was her favorite part. She had found a crystal specialist in Suna after some searching and poking through mission files for any excuse to go there (not to mention actually thinking of what to get for him, until she found out that his old necklace broke). The price was quite horrifying, but she managed to settle it after a few extra shifts at the hospital.

Her bed did not provide any warmth when a cool autumn breeze entered through her open window. It sent her plain curtains flying, made goosebumps tingle her skin and also messed her pastel pink hair. Not that it was neat in the first place. She sloppily brushed the shoulder-length strands back into place with her unoccupied hand.

Back to staring and moping. She turned her eyes to the two bells on the necklace. They were none other than the bells from Kakashi's infamous bell test. Using the excuse of wanting to have them as a keepsake, she got the bells as well as some wise words she had already forgotten from her old sensei. She felt a bit guilty for lying, (and a bit for purposely breaking those bells); but had she not been lying to herself all her life?

_I hate people who lie to themselves!_

Those words stung her heart worse than a Chidori and left a ball of choking sadness in her throat. Ever since that confrontation with Naruto in the Land of Iron, everything was a blur. She was unsure how to feel - so all was left was anger and confusion. Then she failed to kill Sasuke... and Naruto had to save her, as usual. She had tried to find reasons to be angry with him, but she could not. She hated it. She hated herself.

It had only been three months after the Fourth Great Shinobi War - the war that was probably going to be one of those big highlights in history, as it barely lasted four months - and so many things have changed. For Naruto, and for Sakura. Sasuke had gone back into hiding - intelligence teams always came back empty-handed, no matter how far they went. Tsunade had immediately announced that Naruto was the new heir to the Hokage during the celebration night hosted in Konoha, attended by the entire Alliance. Almost no one objected this decision - he was the hero of the war anyways. He had been going under some political training and whatnot for a short while; her Shishou claimed that he had learned pretty fast, earning snorts of disbelief from her friends. But it was true.

Her old teammate had been Hokage for exactly ten days. She felt awful for not congratulating him, but hell, the whole shinobi world was congratulating him, for Kami's sake! Why would hers matter?

She, on the other hand, had decided to avoid Naruto like the plague and bury herself in her work at the hospital. Ino had lectured her about overworking herself several times, but she didn't really care. At first, she had told herself, that she needed time to think. Think as in wonder why he would have said such a thing. At that time, during her confession, she had to admit that she was confused with her feelings - but somewhere, deep inside, she liked Naruto. A lot, she knew. But like in what way? A friend? A teammate? A brother?

But later on, she found herself too scared to confront him again. He had practically said that he hated her. How would he react to her now?

Now, months later, after never-ending shifts at the hospital, watching him from a distance, nights of staying up and thinking, she finally came to a conclusion.

She did love Naruto.

As a lover.

...

When she thought about it, it scared her how deep she actually felt for him.

He had earned her trust, respect and friendship a million times over - what else could she say, without taking days of... well, thinking.

Another breeze, stronger this time, brought her out of her musings and once again messed up her hair. She looked at her clock.

_Two forty-three._

Naruto, she had estimated, probably had an office full of paperwork waiting for him during his first week - this seventh sense came from being a Hokage's apprentice - and that he probably must have much less work, seeing as it was a time of peace. The less work he had, the earlier he left his office.

The sooner she could sneak this damn necklace onto his desk.

She felt that she had the obligation to do it, just like every other time something, anything related to Naruto popped up; and then she would try to 'help', only to end up making things worse...

Shaking her head to clear her mind, she sat up and got out of her bed. Fixing her hair with a hand, she clenched the necklace in the other.

She had a birthday present to deliver.


End file.
